best date ideas to spice things up in San Francisco
I’m sure you’ve asked ChatDaddy (aka ChatGPT) to find the most romantic things to do while you’re in San Francisco. But there are only so many restaurants, bars, and views of the Golden Gate Bridge you can do together. Plus I have a feeling you’re looking for something to actually spice things up and make your date night not so basic.
No plans yet? No worries. I’ve gone ahead and done the hard part for you by pulling together this expert list of spicy date ideas to help you celebrate your special occasion the right way — whatever that means for you.
Whatever you’re into and wherever you are in your current ’ship—whether you’re longtime lovers, just started seeing each other, or are stuck in some sort of unlabeled situationship — there are so many ways to make your date night special. Maybe you’re looking for a chill, low-key (and low-budget!) way to celebrate with someone special, maybe you’d rather go all out and book a sexy staycation or couples getaway, or, hey, maybe you haven’t even begun to think about what you want to do while you’re in San Francisco and just came here desperate for ideas! Either way, you can rest easy knowing that there's a date idea out there for you. In fact, there’s probably one right here.
Here are a few ways to bring more surprise, variety, and adventure to your date while you’re in the Bay Area:
Taken by Your Eyes Only
Not-So-Basic Activities:
Antique Vibrator Museum - If you’re on Polk St, take your partner to this small 1-room museum in an adult shop tracing the history of the sex toy from the 19th century. Admission is free.
Good Vibes - After the museum, why not go next door together and pick out something new? Whether it's a vibrator that you've never tried before, a new lube, or a costume for role play, going together helps you build up anticipation for an intimate time later in the night.
Hot Cookie - Order a naughty dessert from a local baker to surprise your partner after your visit from Good Vibes.
Black Cat Jazz Supper Club - Enjoy a swanky jazz lounge, cocktail bar, and New American bistro in an underground experience.
Cocktail Class - Elevate your cocktail making skills while you get to drink the delicious concoctions you get to make.
Moongate Lounge - You and your partner visit a lunar-inspired listening lounge that transports patrons to another world through velvet high-back booths, blue carpets, and restored Chinese murals.
Punch Line Comedy - If you and your date prefer to keep it chill and have a laugh, then get tickets to a standup show where I can guarantee a comedian will be only too happy to have a couple to call out in their set.
Exploratorium After Dark - An adult only museum to unplug, have a drink, and play with 650+ interactive exhibits exploring science, art, and perception.
Great Star Theater - “After Dark” intertwines temptation and charisma, naive beauty and pure athleticism, breathtaking tricks and naughty little stunts. All in one unique sensual and stylish production.
Banya, Watercourse Way, or Kabuki Springs - Take a moment out of your day to relax with a couple’s massage or a soak in their various baths.
Orr Hot Springs - Want to elevate your relaxation? Northern California has some clothing optional resorts, pools, and hot springs surrounded by nature if you’re looking to get out of the city.
Omakase on a Yacht - If you really want to impress your partner, look into Japanese fine dining on a yacht where you’re surrounded by breathtaking views and amazing food.
Immersive Yoga - For my athletic couples, take your date up a notch by booking a multisensory yoga experience in a night club.
Lands End - One of the popular spots to watch the sunset. Grab a bottle of wine, glasses, and an assorted cheese snacks with you to make this a romantic moment.
Ocean Beach Fire Pits - Bring your own firewood for beachfront bonfires, cozy blanket, and wine for a romantic sunset watching date.
DIY Spicy Photos - With your iPhone or a Polaroid camera, get dressed up (or down) with your partner and take turns taking sexy pictures of each other…for each other. (Just remember that consent should be discussed prior to taking the pictures, and make sure to have a conversation about what’s expected once the pictures are taken re: if they will be thrown away, kept, etc.) If you end up keeping your photos, surprise your partner with a naughty photo album.
Couples Boudoir Photos - If you want to elevate your spicy selfies and remember your sexy date night, book a session with Your Eyes Only to have photos to look back on and say “damn, we look hot”.
Marshall’s Beach - With the reputation of being primarily a gay nude beach, enjoy the sunshine, and make some friends with the Golden Gate Bridge as your backdrop.
Oasis - For a great night out in the LGBTQ scene. It was a former bath house that was purchased by two drag artists in a response to the fact that a lot of the drag bars were closing as the city gentrified. They converted it into a bar and now host regular drag shows.
EroBay - To each their own ;) I’ll leave this here for my kinky couples.
Moody Bars:
Romantic Restaurants:
Sensual Hotels:
Auberge Hotel (coming soon 2025)
Alila Ventana (Big Sur)
Auberge du Soleil (Napa)
Post Ranch Inn (Big Sur)
If you booked your romantic hotel room and brought something sexy to wear, might as well elevate your special occasion with a boudoir session to remember your spicy time. An experience for both couples or solo boudoir.
Disclaimer: All businesses featured here are independently selected by me. I’m not being sponsored or receiving commission when you click the links.
